Author Feature: Andrew Joyce | A Book A Week

Author Feature: Andrew Joyce

My name is Andrew Joyce and I write books for a living. Ethan has been kind enough to allow me a little space on his blog to promote my new novel novel RESOLUTION: Huck Finn’s Greatest Adventure. I think its a good book, but what do I know? Anyway, I'm kinda shy about tooting my own horn. So I think I'll turn things over to my dog Danny---Danny the Dog. He always has a bad attitude and usually does not speak highly of me. But please understand that we co-exist as the old Soviet Union and the United states once co-existed. We tolerate each other. Without further ado, here's Danny. 

Andrew dragged me through the pouring rain so that I could be here to help him out. For a person that works with words for a living, he has very little to say in real life. He wants me to tout his book for him, but I don't think I will. I'm in a foul mood today, so this communiqué will be short. It's been raining for three days and three nights. One more day of this miserable weather and I'm going to have Andrew build us an ark. Well, maybe not, seeing as how we already live on a boat. We being myself, Danny the Dog and my human, Andrew. 

The Things about rain I don't like is that it's wet. It soaks your fur; it keeps you inside when you could be out chasing cats of running down a tantalizing scent. And to top it off, it brings thunder with it. Ant I don't like thunder! Another thing I don't like about rain is that one has to has to go outside to do one's "business." Hey . . . I can hold it. I'll wait until it's dry outside, but Andrew insists that I go out at least twice a day. Rain or shine. 

When It's raining, Andrew puts on some sort of yellow getup that keeps him dry, but does he have one of those things for me? Nope!

For three days now, he's taken me---against my will---outside with him in the rain. If I knew how to use a phone, I'd report him to the Humane Society. But I show him. When we come back, I jump up on the bed and roll around until I'm dry. I don't mind wet sheets, but for some reason Andrew does. 

So here I am trying to sell his book for him. And I know with a certainty that the big lummox is going to come to me when I'm done shilling for him and say, "Okay boy. Let's go for a walk." And I'll be thinking, "Okay, human; how about I just bite you instead?"

Here he comes. The next time we talk, I'll let you know if we went out in the rain or if I bit him. 

Oh yeah, I almost forgot---go out and buy Andrew's book and make him happy. 

This is Andrew again. On behalf of Danny and myself, I would like to thank Ethan for having us over. It's been a real pleasure. 


This entry was posted on Friday, April 29, 2016 and is filed under ,,,. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response.

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